You know what bugs me about soulmate aus? So, I’m assuming that this whole “the first thing your soulmate says to you blahblahblah” is a worldwide thing. So many of the aus I’ve read have a quote at some point that addresses how tragic it is when people have soul words that say something like “hi” or “‘sup” which makes NO SENSE! In a world where the first thing you say to people is THAT important, WHY GOD WHY would the culture still use standard greetings? Who the fuck is still saying hello at this point? Everyone in these worlds would surely develop a personalized greeting different from everybody else’s to prevent confusion. Like how no 2 racehorses can have the same racing name? The best part is that every time people met someone new for the first time, they would try to say something that no one else had said. You’d have people meeting eachother at a job intetview, they’d shake hands, smile politely, then one of them would be like “Every Tuesday, I hard even grape purple farm house sunsets too” and this would be perfectly normal. Or you’d go up to the cash register at Starbucks and instead of saying “Hello, what can i get for you today?” She’d look you right in the eye and say “I don’t know what Space Jam is” THEN ask you what you want and she’d repeat that to every customer in the line for the rest of her career. And because they live in the AU, nobody would think it was weird.
op you are forcibly opening my third eye with a crowbar and i am here for it
Everyone needs their own signature look. Even if it’s ripped off from your favourite character from a film you like, maybe it’s just wearing the same coat you love till you wear it out completely, a favourite repetitive colour or a style from another era, perhaps a person you’ve read about, fiction or non-fiction, real or not has inspired you. The point is, we all need to find that special way of dressing ourselves that makes us feel like the main character of our own private novel.
flower language has always been an intense source of disappointment for me
like, they all mean really generic things like “love” or “forever” or “i’m sorry”
i thought you could combine flowers
like you could just send someone a bouquet and from the combination of hibiscus and posies and tulips they’d understand “the rebel leader is dead, rendezvous at the docks at 8, bring the dog, you will need lighter fluid and a large tomato”
I really hope no one’s answered this for you yet, I saw this and got so excited that my obscure knowledge base might come into use. I had to stretch a few flowers so to speak but Victorian flower language allows for alteration in meaning depending on colour, fruit, flower, bud, steam, leaves and thorns, so I didn’t feel I was too far out of line. This message would work best as two bouquets bound together. First red Nasturtium with no leaves (red denotes a leader, the nasturtium a patriot) mixed with white or red Mask Flowers (rebellion, red if you want to emphasize fighting, white martyrdom) around Cypress (death). Then Chick weed (rendezvous) and Blue Convolvulus (night) surrounded by eight White Popular Leaves (symbolises the time: eight), Yellow Iris (flame, and a flower that grows by rivers) and Yellow Prarie Dock Flowers (this was closest I could find to docks)and one large Tomato Leaf, all bound in Dogwood Bark. Dogwood represents deceit, but as far as I could find the bark wasn’t used symbolically, and as you referred to the dog instead of a dog, I thought it was likely the pun should be a dead giveaway.
So there’s your rebel message!
This is amazing.
#thank you flower arranging side of tumblr
I love this.
I’ve seen this post a few times now but this is my first time seeing it firsthand on tumblr.
I love it so much
basically, i think the general rule of thumb is: if someone REALLY wants the blood that’s inside of your body, and they’re like… a vampire, or a dracula, or some sort of mansquito, then that’s probably okay. a dracula and a mansquito are made for removing things like blood and swords from inside your body. that’s basically fine.
if something wants to get at your blood, and they’re, say, some kind of murdersaurus, or maybe a really big frog, that’s where the problems start to arise. a really frog is not made for removing blood, and your blood knows this, which is why it is so vehement about wanting to stay IN your body instead of coming out.
unfortunately this will not deter a really big frog, because a really big frog is full of things like prizes, and value, and quite a lot of hatred, and it would REALLY rather like to replace any and all of those things with your blood, and basically by any means possible.
These words scan with a fantastic degree of confidence considering that together they make no sense at all
Yall rlly need to stop sexualizing the kids. And not just the girls. I see you nasty fuckers drawing the boys all sweaty and shirtless. Fuck off they’re 15
Yall won’t reblog this but go and reblog posts sayin the same about the girls and turn right around to reblog some more pics of 15 year old boys in sexual positions cause yall need something to jack off to I fucking see you
reblog this version cowards.
A nun gets into a cab and notices that the driver can’t stop staring at her.
So she asks him why is he staring and he answers, “I have a question I need to ask you but I don’t want to offend you.”
The nun replies, “My dear son, you cannot offend me. When you’re as old as I am and have been a nun as long as I have, you have had a chance to see and hear just about everything. I’m sure that there’s nothing you could say or ask that I would find offensive.”
The cab driver hesitates for a moment and then says, “Well it’s like this; I’ve always had a fantasy to have a nun perform oral sex on me.”
The nun replies, “Ok well, let’s see what we can do about that, shall we. There are two conditions though, firstly you have to be single and secondly you must be Catholic.”
The cab driver is very excited and says, “Yes, yes! I am single and I’m Catholic too!”
The nun then says, “Ok then, pull into the next alley.”
The cab driver does so and the nun duly goes ahead and fulfills his fantasy. They get back on the road and start driving again, but the cab driver soon starts to cry.
The nun sees this and asks him, “My dear child, pray tell, why are you crying?”
The cab driver says, “You must forgive me sister, but I have sinned. I lied to you, I must confess that I’m married and I’m also Jewish.”
The nun laughs and says, “That’s OK, my name is Kevin and I’m on my way to a Halloween party.”