Theory Time

The reason endermen don’t like it when you look at them is because they communicate telepathically with one another by locking eyes! Humans are absolutely not designed to do this so when we look at them we are accidentally projecting all of our thoughts into them at the same time and it hurts :(

But like, since the player is not of the Minecraft world, the player is just what the use to explore it, what if it’s like:

Enderman: *looks at player’s eyes*

Player: 01010010 01100001 00100000 01110010 01100001 00100000 01010010 01100001 01110011 01110000 01110101 01110100 01101001 01101110 00100000 01101100 01101111 01110110 01100101 01110010 00100000 01101111 01100110 00100000 01110100 01101000 01100101 00100000 01010010 01110101 01110011 01110011 01101001 01100001 01101110 00100000 01110001 01110101 01100101 01100101 01101110 00100000 01101111 01101000 00100000 01100110 01110101 01100011 01101011 00100000 01100001 01101110 00100000 01100101 01101110 01100100 01100101 01110010 01101101 01100001 01101110

Enderman: oh ok *attacks player*

This kills me every single fucking time

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Are TikToks eligible for Academy awards?

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great avatar the last airbender video essays


Sometimes you just want to listen to people that sound smart talk about how objectively amazing your favorite show is – it’s some sweet, sweet validation and it makes you remember or realize why you love what you love. Luckily, when your favorite show is Avatar, there are a TON of commentary videos that analyze what makes it so great. 

So here are some of my personal favorites:

And I know we don’t like to talk about the movie that shall not be named, but some of the best analysis of what makes the show so great shows up in these videos that contrast the two - 

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Shane taunting demons to the Another One Bites The Dust baseline is my aesthetic

Video from Sim Mallec on YouTube

If this isn’t chaotic energy. Then I don’t know what is.

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You wanna know some impressive shit? The Cuttlefish is colorblind, and yet despite that it can change its colors PERFECTLY to mimic its surroundings.



Just like Daredevil, they can probably feel the vibrations of different color textures via sound waves or some other bullshit.

Oh the truth is even more bullshit than that, if recent deductions are correct:

Because every color is a different wavelength, it’s possible to have a lens focused in such a way that only one color at a time is clear and others are blurry.

So it seems that the eyes of cephalopods rapidly “sweep” across every possible level of focus. It might all look like different shades of grey to them, but in just an instant, their powerful brain registers exactly which shades of grey come clear at exactly which levels of focus and tells the skin which chromatophores to switch on and off to match that shade as close as possible.

*focusfocusfocusfocusblurblurblurblurblurblur* I don’t know what these other assholes are seeing but THESE greys in THIS situation sure seem to confuse them”

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Y’all, I’m over here DYING cuz Google suggested me this article about the crisis of backyard chicken keepers– which is that they love having chickens so much that they keep getting more, and then don’t know what to do with all the eggs.

Which I can see how this would be a problem, but it’s just so funny to me because they had interviewed this one guy who started off with 3 chickens, and then kept adding more and more, and eventually started donating the eggs to a local food bank, and at the end of the year when they wrote him a tax receipt, he discovered he’d donated over 400 dozen eggs.

Seriously, it was a whole article talking very seriously about how people are so into chickens that they just keep collecting them like pokemon and then have to “scramble” (their words not mine) to get rid of the eggs, because they weren’t even thinking of egg production, they just loved having chickens.

And while I may be over here laughing a bit too hard, honestly? Big Mood.

This is an actual joke to bakyard chicken keepers called “chicken math” where if something happens and they lose one they get multiples more to replace it

Also omg dontating eggs to a foodbank is an amazing idea!! I was eating so many I developed an allergic reaction and can’t eat them anymore (tho my inability to eat eggs at all didn’t stop us from buying 3 more chicks this past spring to add to our flock of 5…)

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Twist on the ‘chosen one’ trope that I’ve been super into lately: your hero is the actual Chosen One, selected by gods or destiny or what-have-you, but they themselves think they’re lying about it.

It’s been centuries and nobody’s been able to pull the magic blade that can kill the demon king from the stone, but people keep dying–so the local blacksmith takes a hammer and chisel to the rock in the middle of the night because fuck it, somebody has to do something.  Little do they know the sword was specifically placed so as to be un-drawable by everyone until somebody came along with enough practicality to do things the sensible way.

The paladin very definitely never had any prophetic dreams, but if she’d said she was leaving her village to go be a mercenary just because she was so desperate to get out everybody would have cried and scolded and been super-judgy, so she maybe invented a Call a little bit.  But now her first aid’s working way better than it should and some weird shit happened the other day with those undead, and she still hasn’t had had any contact from her god but she’s not meant to be this good of a liar.

A trio of con artists take on the persona of an old folk-legend for a job, and gets in over their heads when a little sleight-of-hand gets out of hand and the whole countryside starts believing it.  They end up fulfilling half the prophecy just by deliberately trying so the con doesn’t fall apart around them.  Meanwhile the other half of the prophecy’s coming true around them at every turn, which they keep chalking up to good fortune, assuming one of their co-conspirators is pulling off on purpose, or just plain not noticing because they’re too distracted with the rest of the con.

Possibly I just need to watch The Road to El Dorado again, but seriously, more of THIS trope please.

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Seeing John Mulaney do his ‘Robot Test’ bit has given me a strong desire to see him play a live action Riddler.

But not like, as any character other than John Mulaney? Like, let’s make a John Mulaney version of Edward Nigma. Just this socially awkward disaster man who somehow becomes a supervillain because of a misunderstanding he couldn’t correct without ‘seeming rude’. And now supposedly he’s committed to killing Batman but he doesn’t actually want to be the cause of a man’s death so he just obfuscates things with ‘clues’ and ‘riddles’ and ‘battles of wits’ until Batman inevitably defeats him and he’s just like ‘oh thank god please don’t hit me’.

Batman’s like ‘you need help Nigma’ and he’s just like ‘yeah that’s fair, I should probably look into seeing somebody at this point, I became a supervillain because of social anxiety and that might just be a red flag you know?’


“Hey, Batman, think you’ve seen everything, huh? Well, figure out how to deal with this! You know Gotham General Hospital? Yeah? Well you’ll never guess what I let loose in there!”

“Riddle me this, what has four hooves and presents a massive health and safety violation?”

so i wrote a fic

I felt I had no choice

somehow i missed this reblog when it was originally posted and i feel we should all take a moment to appreciate this masterpiece of editing

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me, reaching into my dresser drawer for black pants: I hope this isn’t the pair with big holes worn in the inner thighs

Marie Kondo, gently over my shoulder: why is a pair of pants you find unwearable still in your dresser drawer

me: oh shit that’s right!! The dresser is for clothes that under some circumstance I might conceivably wear!!

Marie Kondo, beaming proudly: Yes, that’s correct!! These pants must have been your favorites. How wonderful that they were so comfortable and practical that you wore them out. But now since they no longer function as pants, you should move them from the drawer where you keep your functioning pants!

me: Yes thanks I got it they’re in the fabric basket now

Marie Kondo, fading back into the darkness: I love what you’ve done with the kitchen!!

The notion of KonMari as some creepy semi-embodied but entirely benevolent spirit, like a well-intentioned Bloody Mary, is so perfect and wonderful.

Marie Kondo has the same powers but the exact opposite energy of the Duolingo Owl.


Marie Kondo: Your room isn’t very clean, but that’s okay, I love mess! Does this spark joy?

Duolingo Owl: I wrote the ransom note in Spanish, and if you have to use Google Translate to read it, your kid gets it. You broke your streak. I’ll break your neck.

Marie Kondo holding your child, while standing on the remains of the Duolingo Owl : The Bird did not spark joy

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Video of Tama

Follow Ultrafacts for more facts

The picture in the background of the second one

Tama is boss


Sad update everyone, Tama recently passed away… An estimated 3,000 people, including railway officials, attended Tama the cat’s funeral on Sunday, days after she died of heart failure aged 16. [x]

For those who haven’t read articles about it, the local shrine elevated her to a god. She’s now the Eternal Stationmaster and patron god of the station.


Now I’m crying thanks

and a new cat was hired right?

yep! her name is Nitama (essentially ”second tama” or “tama II”) and she served under Tama as an apprentice before being appointed her deputy

she works very hard

Everytime this crosses my dash, I reblog. It is the law.


I’m crying at 11pm over train cats

Nitama, already now a mature cat (born 2010), has a protege named Yontama (fourth Tama, b. 2016).  There is no information available for either the physical befellment or tragic self-disgrace which has removed Santama from contention.


^Nitama majestic, and below with Yontama




a legacy

okay but actually what happened to santama (or sun-tama-tama, which is her name because it’s a pun on santama) was that she was basically sent to train for the position in okayama and they liked her so much they refused to send her back

“Sun-tama-tama” (a pun off of “Santama”, lit. “third Tama”) was a calico cat sent for training in Okayama. Sun-tama-tama was considered as a candidate for Tama’s successor, but the Okayama Public Relations representative who had been caring for Sun-tama-tama refused to give the cat up writing, “I will not let go of this child, she will stay in Okayama.” [25]

As of September 2018, Sun-tama-tama is working as the stationmaster in Naka-ku, Okayama and appears occasionally on Tama’s Twitter account.

Every time I see this post there’s new info and it gets better

You are only allowed to scroll pass this after you pay tribute to the great Tama Station masters.

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Spider-verse is out on Netflix!!!

everyone needs to know!

Seriously, please spread the word! It’s honestly one of the best movies of our time and definitely deserves a watch if you missed its run in theaters!

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not to be a history fucker on main but the whole mystery of the lost colony of roanoke is so fucking funny

governor of the colony: hey I’m gonna go back to england to get more supplies

115 colonists: okay

governor: ends up spending 3 years in england bc of a naval war with spain or some shit

governor: gets back to the colony to find everyone gone

governer: sees the word “croatoan”, the name of a native american tribe, carved into a post

croatoan tribe: has members and children with blonde hair/blue eyes, pale skin

everyone: what could have happened to the colonists of roanoke

racism is a hell of a drug

governor: I can’t believe my colony died

roanoke folks: actually these really nice people took us in? we left you a note about that? so please stop telling everyone we’re dead?

governor: Sometimes I Can Still Hear Their Voices

Some of those suspiciously mixed-looking Croatoan tribes-people were even still using the surnames of the Roanoke colonists! The degree to which ‘The Mystery of Roanoke’ is NOT EVEN SLIGHTLY MYSTERIOUS is fucking ridiculous! As an out-and-proud history fucker, I cannot tell you how mad I was when I decided to look into this ~super tantalising mystery~ only to find that it’s so dumb. It’s so dumb, guys.

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Alien: You’re telling me that in times of great distress humans have been known to suddenly gain the strength necessary to lift objects more than a dozen times their own weight?!

Human: Yeah, it’s called “hysterical strength” and it usually happens in life-or-death situations, like when someone gets stuck under a car or something and someone lifts the car to get them out. We can’t really test it though, ‘cause it only happens spontaneously.

Alien: Humans have the ability to tap into untold strength and power and you don’t even know how you do it?

Human: Pretty much, yeah. We think it has something to do with temporary analgesia, so we just don’t feel the pain we should when we pick up a 3000-pound car.


Human: Yeah, it’s like an adrenaline thing? Do you not have that?

Alien: Fuck you and your entire species of tiny juggernauts.

Did this post just use a dialogue format to trick me into learning science

Had to check this out on wikipedia at least and boy was that a ride


Just so you guys know. Hysterical strength is basically your body not holding back and going %100 though there is a great danger of you hurting yourself or breaking something since your ignoring pain and going %100. There was a case where a kid deadlifted a car to save a sibling but,cracked 8 of his teeth during it because he was clenching his jaw so hard. So whilst you can lift a car or fight off polar bears. Your probably going to break something. Because most of the time when we are “giving our all” we are only giving a fraction of what we could give and this is because if we truly give our all we can seriously injure ourselves.

This is literally an explanation of Deku and his abilities with One For All.

Humans naturally hold back because our muscles have enough strength to rip themselves apart


During an adrenaline rush your muscles can stress themselves to the point where they rip themselves from the bone and you wouldn’t even feel it

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i can’t stop watching this i’m …

what the fuck

brief reminder that humans are among the best vocal mimics on Earth

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The brain is just 8 lbs of meat that sits in complete darkness and plays a video game of what it thinks is the most realistic thing ever.

it’s 3lbs, not 8. also it’s not really meat, it’s mostly fat with some water and salt. You have a wad of soggy bacon inside your skull. And this blob of gross unprocessed jello somehow manages to run a complex biomechanical suit using less electricity than it takes to work a lightbulb.

And people wonder why humans are so fucking weird and have odd experiences that aren’t actually real. I mean, if a bowl of tapioca pudding managed to hallucinate so vividly it invented calculus, it also going “dude, i heard a weird noise and i’m 100% sure it was the ghost of the neighbor’s cat which hasn’t actually died yet” would be just as expected as anything else.

Omfg dying

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1. Slip out the back, Jack

2. Make a new plan, Stan

3. Don’t need to be coy, Roy

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