I never see memes specific to my interests, so I made a few.
for when the elastic on your socks is dying so you make garters
And for when you don’t have quite enough fabric and need to do piecing!
i really like to imagine ancient natural historians hanging out on tumblr because they would fucking love it here. you can post all the dumb unverified bullshit you want and people will not only believe you without factchecking, but they’ll spread your bullshit around? pliny the elder would have a heyday. aelian would go absolutely apeshit. aristotle would be crying. they would run a ‘today i learned’ blog together and post stuff like ‘TIL that men have more teeth than women!’ and get 50,000 notes
Eldest son. I can smile pretty for social occasions and put up with conjugal activities just enough to produce a kid or two (because, after all, I do want kids) in return for him leaving me to the company of my Dearest Bosom Lady Companion™ most of the time.
Pick your Georgian era suitor:
• Eldest son who will inherit the entire estate and fortune, but he’s arrogant, unromantic, and not at all your type. He doesn’t want a lengthy courtship or engagement, he just wants to get the marriage over and done with so he can finally start hosting boring whist parties and produce an heir and a spare.
• Middle son, who won’t inherit but who is also, quite happily for you, very attractive, good in bed, and romantic. Unfortunately, he’s quite the libertine (you are only ONE of his many conquests this year) and what’s more, he’s a soldier so when you marry him, you probably won’t see him all that much, and he might ultimately die young in battle.
• Youngest son, who, because he won’t inherit, has taken up a profession much like his brother, the middle son. Unfortunately, the profession he has chosen is that of clergyman, meaning he’s super religious and whips out Fordyce’s Sermons for Young Women any chance he gets in an attempt to impress you. If you marry him, you will have to endure the simple, thrifty living of a respectable parson’s wife…..but you WILL be financially stable, well respected in society, and ultimately unbothered by your husband, who will never have any extra-marital affairs and thinks women are too delicate to be much pressed on anything. He also has a fantastic library at his parsonage.
Sometimes I see posts with medieval art and somebody demanding to know what was going on during the middle ages. I therefore present to you a list:
- In 897, Pope Stephen VI had his predecessor’s body dug up and tried for heresy. The corpse was found guilty and thrown in the Tiber.
- In 1122 or thereabouts, Heloise de Argenteuil named her son Astrolabe.
- In 1141, Empress Matilda was besieged in a castle by her cousin Steve, and escaped by pretending to be dead and getting carted out with the corpses.
- In 1314 King Edward II made soccer illegal. This was the same King Edward II whose wife Isabella had him killed by shoving a fireplace poker up his ass.
- In 1325 some guys from Modena, Italy, stole the bucket from the well in neighbouring Bologna. The two cities fought a battle over it. Modena won, and still has the bucket on display in a museum.
- In 1355 students at Oxford rioted because a pub served them sub-par beer.
- In 1374 France and Belgium suffered an outbreak of ‘dancing plague’. The affected would dance until they died of heart attacks.
- In 1379 a guy named Perrinot Muet was trampled to death by pigs. The pigs were tried for murder, found guilty, and hanged.
- Between 1410 and 1419, there were three different guys in different parts of Europe all claiming to be Pope. They each excommunicated the other two and all their adherents.
- In 1456, Pope Callixtus the Third excommunicated Halley’s Comet.
In conclusion, a lot went on during the middle ages.
samtaims ai vonder if inglis spiiking piipöl aar eiböl tu riölais thät ai äm äksöli vraiting in inglish rait nau bat tsast vith veri finnish spelling
sou if juu spiik inglish bat not finnish kän juu pliis reblog änd liiv ö komment on tis post tänk juu veri mats
Sammteims ei wonda iff inglisch schbieking pipel ahr ebel tu rieleis set ei ehm ecktschuli reiting in inglisch reit nauh batt schast wiss währi tschörmen schbelling
So iff ju schbiek inglisch batt nott tschörmen kenn ju plies riplock end lief eh kommänt on dies pust senk ju wäri matsch
tänk juu for joor tsörman kontribjuusson, ai äpprishieit it veri mats. änd it oolsou helps mii tu gräsp tö essens of tsörman äksent
Samtajms aj vonder if ingliš spíking pípl ár ejbl tu rielajz det aj em ekšuely rajting in ingliš rajt náv bat džast vit veri slovak speling. Sou if jú spík ingliš bat not slovak ken jú plís riblog end lív en koment on tiz poust tenk jú veri mač
I’ve screwed up hard, y’all.
I went to the charity shop in town to try to find something for a project, and found a massive red coat that was far too large for me. It was made of 100% wool, so I bought it, cut it apart, and started making a pair of breeches from it. That coat is LONG gone.
But the more I look back at the photo I took wearing it the more I like how it looked, and wish I’d kept it intact to wear with modern clothes. I know these breeches are going to turn out crummy, which makes it even worse.
I really found a wonderful coat for only £10 and then immediately destroyed it. God, I’m mad at myself.
Hello! Your embroidery is beautiful! Do you perhaps have tips or could recommend webpages/videos on how to embroider? I'm especially interested in how to do these mushrooms/flowers, which kind of stitches (?)/styles produce these artworks? Thank you for posting your gorgeous results!
Hello, and thank you!
I learned embroidery mostly from books, and have somehow watched hardly any embroidery videos. But I know there are lots and lots of websites and videos out there.
The main book I refer to now for embroidery is 18th Century Embroidery Techniques by Gail Marsh, but the Reader’s Digest Complete Guide to Needlework is my go-to book for anything that’s not in the 18th century one.The Readers Digest one is VERY thick and has a huge range of stuff from quilting to bobbin lace, and an excessively large number of embroidery stitches. It’s a very common book and if your local library doesn’t have it you can get a secondhand copy for pretty cheap. (Here’s one on etsy for $7.) And it’s just one of many similar needlework guidebooks, so it ought to be pretty easy to obtain one. The 18th century one still has a lot of stuff that typical needlework guides don’t though, like metal embroidery.
But you asked specifically about the mushrooms and flowers I’ve posted, and I’m happy to report that those require only a few basic stitches! Needlework guides are full of dozens of different stitches and variations, but most projects only require a small number of them.
Here’s a breakdown of what I’ve been using, with links to tutorials for each stitch.
Satin Stitch - This is one of the most common, especially for flowers and leaves and other such solid shapes. I prefer to use one strand for this, so I don’t have to un-twist anything.
You can also do Padded Satin Stitch, which is the same except you work it on top of one or more layers of satin stitch, or some other filling stitch. This makes it more 3 dimensional. For my waistcoat I’m not padding it though, I want my shapes to be nice and flat like a picture.
Long and short stitch - Very similar to satin stitch, but with longer and shorter bits so you can fill a larger area, or blend different colours together. This shows up a lot on shaded flowers and leaves. I used it to do a little bit of shading on my tree stump, and to fill in the wider part of my green mossy ground, because you don’t want to make your satin stitches excessively long.
This little sample I did a few years ago illustrates it more clearly.
Stem Stitch - Also fairly similar to satin stitch, but done thin and very slanted. It’s pretty easy to vary the thickness, like I’m doing for my maple twigs.
French Knots - These take a little practice because you need to get the tension right, but they’re not difficult. I’m using them for the dots on my mushrooms. The mushrooms themselves and their little patches of substrate are done in satin stitch, and the French knots added on top afterwards.
For the ferns I’m using stem stitch for the stalk, and to do the leaves I just do little straight lines coming off them. These are easy, you just bring the needle up at the tip of the leaf and back down again at the end that’s attached to the stalk, or the other way around, whichever. This probably has a name but I don’t know what it is.
The brown fanned out triangles on the border are done like my fern leaves too. Just in on one side and out on the other to make little straight stitches. The clusters of 3 green dots are French knots, and the solid green and brown lines on either side are satin stitch.
Split Stitch - That Beardsley inspired waistcoat I made all those years ago was almost entirely done in split stitch, with the exception of a few French knots here and there. Chain Stitch produces a very similar effect though.
Backstitch - This is a stitch I mostly use for garment construction, and it produces nice strong seams, but it’s also good for embroidering thin and fairly smooth outlines. It’s what I used for most of the embroidery on my monster waistcoat.
There are a lot more embroidery stitches, but that’s most of what I’ve been using!
Taken individually the stitches themselves are fairly easy, and when you use them all together in different shapes and colours you get something that can look much more complicated than it really is. I hope this is sufficient to get you started on whatever it is you’re looking to embroider.
Remember to always do samples before starting a Big Project!
concept: a self help book for greek heroes
these are the chapter titles i’ve already come up with
- So Zeus Is Your Dad
- What To Do When A Sexy Nymph Falls In Love With You
- Bloodlust And You: A Guide To Keeping Your Kleos Intact
- Planning Your Underworld Vacation: Everything You Need To Know Before Your Katabasis
- Recovering From Hera
- Interpreting Your Prophecies To Fit YOUR Life: How Not To End Up Marrying Your Mom
- How To Handle Becoming A Psychological Phenomenon
@hiddenlookingglass very kindly tagged me to answer 17 questions!
Nickname: Usually Mars. Only one (1) man can get away with calling me Marsy. I get some Mars Bars jokes as well.
Zodiac sign: Virgo, unfortunately.
Hogwarts House: Gryffindor
Last thing I googled: eighteenth century rings
Song stuck in my head: Babylon by Five Seconds of Summer
Amount of sleep I get: 6-8 hours.
Lucky number: 65, my jersey number.
Dream job: Coach.
Wearing: Pajama pants, a t shirt, and a navy blue sweater
Favorite songs: “Go to Sea No More,” specifically the Ian Giles recording, “Northwest Passage” by Stan Rogers, “Leaving of Liverpool,” and “Wild Mountain Thyme”.
Instruments: I used to be able to play a bit of violin, and I’d like to start practicing again.
Random fact: one of my favorite things about living in the UK now is that I can order nachos without fear of being served that horrible neon orange nacho cheese you get in the US.
Aesthetic: Checked linen and scraped knuckles. Hemp rope and a cool, salty breeze. Crisp, bright winter sunlight. Arms thrown around your comrades’ shoulders and unreserved smiles. Clothes that have been worn and mended again. Clear days when you can see for miles. A single brass hoop earring. Muddy knees and bare feet. Barely spending a moment alone. Turquoise and sky blue and bottle green sea glass.
Ah, poor boy! Please rest and take your time getting better. (I know you will not, for you seem to live at breakneck speed, but I say it nonetheless). 🥭 ☕ ❤️ — Eros.
Thank you very much! To my credit, I did. sit out a decent chunk of early morning practice today, and I’ve been looking after myself in my spare time as well!
Sweet Psyche: Lord Byron, Percy Bysshe Shelley, Don Juan, and Mathilda. — Eros.
—Lord Byron: what’s the boldest thing you’ve ever done?
Lately, it would be showing up to men’s trials as a pre-t trans man who’d played maybe four hours of frisbee total before trying out for the squad. (I made the second squad.)
—Percy Bysshe Shelley: who do you share your biggest belief with?
My girlfriend, I suppose. While we’re two very different people with different interests, our moral compasses point in very much the same direction.
—Don Juan: tell your funniest joke.
What should you do when you’re cornered by a pack of clowns? Go for the juggler.
Honestly, I think much of my sense of humor consists of dad jokes, which I perfected as a camp counselor. Once, I made a pun so bad that the kid I made it to made a run for it.
…and Mathilda has already been answered! Thank you so much for asking. 💛
Love’s Philosophy and A Dirge!
—Love’s Philosophy: if you could have anyone next to you right now, who would it be?
My siblings. I haven’t seen them since August, and I miss them both a lot.
—A Dirge: where did you last shed a tear?
In my dorm, I think. Though the context must remain, for now, a secret.
Thank you for the questions! ☺️