Okay…I was just scrolling on tumblr and I saw a post that said “Love is a feeling, not a decision.” And my immediate response was, “Um..that’s false.” But when I clicked on the comments, people were agreeing that love is in fact a feeling and not a decision, so I would just like to throw this unpopular opinion out there.
Love is a feeling for about a month, and a decision for the rest of your life.
If love was just a feeling, divorce would never happen, it would be strong enough to sustain relationships. You’d fall for every guy who whispered sweet nothings, who’s taller than you and has a nice smile.
Love is not something that you feel. You FEEL euphoria, you FEEL joy, you FEEL excitement. You CHOOSE love. After the excitement wears off and you realize you don’t like the way she/he chews, or you don’t like that he swears a lot or whatever other little thing they might do that gets under your skin, you have to CHOOSE that you still want to be with this person in spite of their quirks.
Hollywood has fed us this idea that those feelings of joy and excitement are all that love is. And that some big dramatic event happens that ends in tears and a loving embrace is true love. But that’s not life! When those big dramatic events happen, you usually want to die. Or you want to be alone. Or you question your relationship. Love is not “Oh I feel good around this person so I must love them!” No no my friends, love is the grunt work. It’s staying together in the valleys so you can get the peaks, can I get an Amen?!
This idea that love is just a feeling is why relationships aren’t lasting. Why we all give up so easily. Because if we don’t FEEL it anymore, then it must not exist. If we don’t FEEL it, then it must be over. This rhetoric is killing lasting relationship which is what many of us want and desire.
Now I’m not saying that you should have no emotions with the guy or girl you’re with. You should feel happiness and sparks and all that jazz, but just know that that is not all that love is. And when sh*t hits the fan, it’s not the sparks that will keep your relationship afloat.
This, of course, it my personal opinion.. what do you guys think?
Love is a feeling or a decision?