(submitted by an anonymous INFP and compiled into a single text post):
1. Compliments. Just be vocal about the nice things you can think of about people. Let that one person know you really like their sense of style. Let that other person know their hair always looks nice. I’ve noticed compliments that are deeper seem more genuine. I don’t know how to explain this but, complimenting someone on their sense of style rather than saying they have a nice shirt is always better. Does that make sense? It makes you seem more attentive
2. If you ever see anyone struggling, offer to help them out! This is a big one I feel. Try not to be obvious about it. Some people don’t like to be straight out asked if they need help b/c of their pride and such. So, an example could be that if you see someone struggling with homework, ask what they got on a certain #. They may admit they’re struggling or will ask you what you got & how you got it. Then you just show them, thus helping them out discreetly
3. Volunteer, even if it’s to help clean up after a party attended. (This one kinda connects to 2.) Doing community service projects not only helps w/ the college application process, it makes you a better person & allows you to meet really good people. Plus, you’ll have things to talk about that are usually deep, allowing you to skip the small talk b/c of the atmosphere. Just try to & offer to help in anyway you can; you’ll look benevolent & be respected.
4. Try to remember the little things. You have to be at least acquaintances for this, tho. For example, try to remember people’s birthdays. Even just letting them know you remembered can mean a lot. If you remember someone gushing about a certain chocolate bar, get it for them at the nearest vending machine. You have to be careful with this one. You can go overboard and end up looking creepy. Keep it natural, thoughtful, and most importantly, respectful.
5. Be genuine. Don’t compliment people if you don’t really mean it. Don’t waste your time, or theirs. Be sincere. Be authentic. If you aren’t, people will fall in love with someone that isn’t you, they’ll be friends with an idea of you. Those friendships never last since they are not worth it. You’ll make authentic friendships, with authentic people, if you, yourself are authentic, whatever that may be or mean for you.
6 (and the last one) Be empathetic. The longest lasting, the closest, and the most intimate friendships are those in which both parties can be empathetic with each other. Empathy means “showing an ability to understand and share the feelings of another.” So if someone tells you something and you can relate, let them know! Revel in that connection and solidarity. I really don’t know how else to expand on this. Just be as empathetic & considerate as possible.
Ways I make friends easily as an INFP