i have work i need to do. objectively, i know that. it needs to be done before a certain point in time. as of today, it can no longer be done by that point in time. why? i’ve had the time to finish it. i’ve had the resources. i’ve had the set up ready. but it hasn’t gotten done. because sometimes brains just don’t work. and so even though not doing this work is causing me pain and stress and frustration, i can’t do it. i can sit in front of my computer and look at the screen and not do it for hours and hours and days. and we’re hoping it doesn’t turn into weeks because then i might have wasted a full year of studying just because i couldn’t pull my shit together at the right time.
and that would be a bit tragic.